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Smelly Underwears and Weird Looking Clitorides

Before I begin, did you know that the plural form of the word clitoris is clitorides? Wow! --- Ok, I have 7 minutes before I finish my shift, and I've been itching to write something substantial on my blog for eons already. So what my point for saying these things? I say screw my shift! I'm gonna type something 'til my fingers bleed! Haha! Even though my officemate is sitting beside me cleaning her dirty feet! Wahaha! First off, my Yahoo! account has been hacked. Over the weekend, I tried to access my Yahoo! email at my friend's house to kill some time, but after typing the necessary information and clicking to log in, the screen reappeared and stated that I typed the wrong username/password. I tried doing it again and again, but to no avail. I simply cannot access my account anymore. I can't remember changing my password prior to this, so I guess the only logical reason for this is that my account got hacked. Yes...so much for my contacts. And my email, my preciou

INTj Uncovered!!!

from http://www.socionics.com If there were a Weirdness Olympics between all 16 types then INTj would be an unbeatable gold medallist. In fact INTjs are so weird that they do not just appear weird to people who don't know them well but to other INTjs as well. This is because INTjs take little or no notice of what other people think. What they think themselves is much more important for INTjs. That is why if everybody are certain that bridges have to be build across the river an INTj may contemplate the possibility of building one along the river. There would probably be a logical reason for that since INTjs view everything through the square prism of logic. And as long as logical rules are obeyed everything is fine. "I think, therefore I am" once said Rene Descartes, clearly delighted about the fact that he can think. But what he really meant was "I stink, therefore I am" since INTjs can often deprive themselves of a good bath and can happily live in a pigsty wh

Packin' Sheet at 5 A.M.

1. Anong bago sa'yo ngyon? :: next question... 2. Kumain ka na ba ng balot? :: hindi pa. jologs ko talaga. 3. Sumuka ka na ba sa sobrang hilo? :: sobrang hilo sa pagka-lasing. Huling naalala kong suka ko yung sa inidiro namin. Kulay orange. 4. Nakagulpi ka na ba ng tao? :: hindi pa kasi alam mo yun, mahirap na kapag nakasakit ka nang tao. Biruin mo, baka mamaya, binagastusan mo na yung pangtubos sa yo sa presinto. 5. Nang mamanyak ka ba? :: panong manyak ba? Ganito na lang, hindi ako naninilip, hindi ako nanghihipo, hindi ako nang-hihit-on sa kapwa tao ko, pero nanonood ako ng porno. Pwede na ba yan? 7. Umiinom ka ba hangang hindi ka na makatayo? :: Hindi. Sabi nga ng tatay ko, drink to enjoy, not enjoy to drink. 8. Nka sakay ka na ba ng kalabaw? :: Ay oo! Nung bata ako. 9. Naramdaman mo na bang mamamatay ka na? :: pano ba ang mamatay? Kasi imposile mo namang maranasan ang pakiramdam ng mamamatay ka, kapag hindi ka pa talaga namatay. Anlabo ng tanong na to. I can't answer this!

Creative Writing

Teach Me More It's really surprising how one experience from the past can determine your future. See, not only am I a member of the XXXXX community, but I am also currently a kindergarten teacher in Ohio. During those times, I developed a passion for education, and having students understand and appreciate the things that you're teaching them is one of the most gratifying experiences one can ever imagine. But of course, this realization was all triggered by a particular event. I was neither bright nor diligent when I was a college student, as I have been known to skipping classes and failing exams because of my laziness. I would consider myself as one of the hotter personalities on campus, where guys salivate over me because of my luscious body. I'm the kind of person who has sex on her mind, in which I would hang out with guys and engage in a hot, sexual orgy with them instead of studying for my midterms. One time, like any other time in the lecture room, while one o

The Road to Red Horse Beer Muziklaban 2006 Grand Finals

This was the first picture taken from the moment we arrived at Starmall, Las Piñas for the Red Horse Muziklaban 2006 Semifinals . The band just came off a grueling 2-hour trip from Pasig while listening to Slayer's Reign in Blood , with their hit single "Angel Of Mine" ("Angel of mine/Monarch to the kingdom of the dead!") and Sepultura's Arise ad nauseum. Like the previous round of Muziklaban, bands were asked to arrive early for briefing, at around 1:30 P.M., even though the competition itself would begin at roughly 8 P.M. The band had a lot of time to kill, where they spend most of it goofing around, and to visit the nearby Internet shop flooding their YM and Friendster accounts with messages asking people to vote for them via text message *coughcoughlameandpatheticcough* As of this point, at around 6 P.M., half of the band were tipsy after drinking a glass of Red Horse Beer with their empty stomachs. But just before their share of beer, all of the bands

Music Keeps the Motor Running

The night was still young, and Descant Gott just finished playing as the sixth band of the Red Horse Muziklaban 2006 Eliminations round at Live Van in Marikina. The bar was quite huge, with a second floor reserved for the performing bands that night. We headed to that place after our set, and we got to see a nice overlooking view from the balcony, where the audience laced with black attire stared unto the stage, with Kevin Roy of Razorback leading the festivities. I haven’t performed with the band for almost a month now because my work schedule would not allow it, and we held our practice a week prior to the actual event, but somehow, with all the people watching and the prize at stake, I wasn’t really nervous. However, throughout the duration of our set, I did fuck up a lot of notes, particularly my guitar lead from our first song, and I accidentally stepped on my distortion pedal on our cover of Sepultura’s song “Arise,” which made a sputtering clean tone from the amp. It’s a good th

Scene from the Office Space

About Writing Erotic Stories: Characters: Me, I Person #1 Supervisor Setting: 10:30 in the evening. Person # 1 and I are writing an erotic story, as requested by the supervisor. I was on the verge of finishing the first page of the story, which is about fucking behind the closed doors of an office. I was on a roll. My fingers were blazing through the keyboard like a forest fire, typing words that I wouldn’t even imagine myself saying in public (or would I?) However, I encountered a problem with a particular scene from my story. And so it goes… Me: Alam mo yung tawag sa pag-ganun (does the swiping motion using my left arm, as I draw the movement with my left hand almost touching my right chest, and it goes across, extending my arm to its far side) kapag gusto mo tanggalin yung mga gamit sa lamesa? Ano ba yung word na yun in English? Person #1: (stops typing for a while, and faces me to her left) Ano ulit? Me: Yung ganito kapag gusto mo tanggalin yung mga gamit sa lamesa (I repeat th

Man Juice for the Soul

A couple of weeks ago, I was working for a client who is involved in the porn industry. Basically, I write reviews for various porn sites that he asked me to visit. At first, it seemed like a dream job: I sit in front of the computer, the client hands me the password to the sites, I gain access and download its pictures and videos, and I write what I think about it. However, I was brought back into reality when the client demanded reviews of not less than 500 words discussing the quality of the site, its layout, resolution of the images and videos, and acting of the models (!), among other things. To top it all off, the client was very anal (no pun intended) about the grammar, syntax, and spelling of the words and sentences of the review. Porn, for once, became such a drag. Within the span of three days writing for the client, a lot of changes occurred to me. I lost approximately 5 lbs., I think. Just for the record, I didn’t “choked the bishop” or “peeled the banana” or “skinned the c

Philippine Nationalism

"Oo inaamin ko, sila ay mga yakal, lawaan, apitong at narra! At kami ay saging lang! Pero maghanap kyo ng puno sa buong Pilipinas, saging lang ang may puso.... SAGING LANG ANG MAY PUSO!!! " Mark Lapid, hango sa pelikulang Apoy Sa Dibdib Ng Samar (thanks to Sublumina Girl )

The Luxury of (mis)Fortune

Hay. It's been difficult these past few weeks. Let me count the ways: After three days of being employed, my very first client from my very first job dropped me. Days after, I realized that I left my sister's USB worth in the office, which eventually got lost. Wait. I just realized that it's not as bad as it seems. And why the fuck am I writing like this??? --- On a positive note, I've seen Clockwork Orange. Gloooorious.

Lovely

Smile!

The Zambales Files

¤ It was such a blast playing soccer against Koreans. My friends and I traced lines in the sand that would serve as the field where we are going to play soccer. We were playing our crappy brand of three-on-three soccer that rainy afternoon where nobody among us, save our varsity friend, actually played the game. Then, all of a sudden, these guys who just finished playing volleyball on the other side of the beach challenged us to a game, a race to three. Not surprisingly, we lost, although it was not a walk in the park for them. I still for the life of me can’t figure out how we were to score two goals. Unbelievable shit. In the end, some of us suffered major blister on their sole and toes. Good for me (or not), only my thighs are hurting, and I can’t even walk straight up until now. Despite the outcome, however, the whole experience was fun. ¤ Prior to the football game, we also played a two-on-two rugby game, and I’m not talking about that smelly adhesive that dries up your brain. My

Steve Vai's "Boston Rain Melody"

It was almost 11 o’clock in the evening, in front of the shore on one of the resorts at Iba, Zambales. The tide has tremendously risen up…All of the benches were taken by other lodgers, mostly by Koreans from another resort, so we were forced to sit on the cool sand. Nevertheless, it would not deter us from listening to the CD player and the portable speaker we brought down from our room. We prepared CDs with music conducive to the beach environment, as we already imagine floating on sand and the sight of sea. We were enjoying the CD I compiled a couple of years back, made just before summer of year 2004 started. Some of the songs on that CD are not even beach-worthy material, but we chose to listen to that CD because of one particular song. It starts of with the sound of thunder, while drops of rain slowly pour from the speaker. Then the tender and clean guitar intro follows suit, generating a flowing effect reveling with the rain. The song continues with mesmeric verse lines from the

Slowdive - Machine Gun

They're walking and I know, she's my friend, again Just the way that the water, drags me down, again Please don't think I'm a [...] it's my friend, oh yeah It's just the way that the water, makes me feel, again I went to HMV store in Hong Kong. I remembered the first time I got there years back. A wide array of artists and bands to choose from, from rarities and obscure albums, as well as classic and foreign movies, just blew me away. Not much by any stretch, considering that record stores are supposed to offer different titles anyway, but comparing this store to, say, Odyssey XL or Tower Records in the Philippines, it just had my mind spinning. If it were up to me, I would, for the life of me, stay here the whole trip and ogle at records that I haven’t even heard of. By the time we’re leaving, I can say that our family vacation in Hong Kong was a totally out of body experience. On this visit, it was no different. Saw machine gun I saw you down Saw the arrow I s

The Daily Vault

--- Staff Writer e-mail --- BORN : 1984 JOINED THE DV STAFF : June 2006 HOMETOWN : Philippines NOW LIVING IN : Philippines SPOUSE / KIDS? : No. FAVORITE ARTIST : The Gathering OTHER ARTISTS I LIKE : Ben Folds Five, Devin Townsend, Elliott Smith, Jeff Buckley, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds, Faith No More, The Beatles, My Bloody Valentine, Alice in Chains, Yes, Agalloch, Iron Maiden, Megadeth, Anberlin, Immortal BEER : San Miguel Extra Strong, Red Horse Beer OTHER HOBBIES : Books, movies, blogging, playing guitar, playing/watching basketball, surfing the 'Net PERSONAL MOTTO : And that is why. I WRITE MUSIC REVIEWS BECAUSE : ...it is the only thing that can validate my existence, aside from an awful hangover… enter the vault ...

Them 'Old Filipino Action Movies...'

There was this scene on one of Gardo Versosa's movies where he cocks a gun using his feet. His feet! And the most amazing thing is that he did this while in mid-air! In MID-AIR! Perennial action star Lito Lapid did what no other men did back in the heyday, when during an action scene he was holding a knife and a gun with one bullet left with two enemies still after him. Usually, a normal, sane person would just use the remaining bullet of the gun to shoot one of the baddies, and throw the knife or stab the other. But not Lito Lapid. Nope. What he did is that he placed the sharp side of the knife in the middle of the gun's barrel, splitting the bullet in half as he fired the gun, and hitting both his enemies. Pure classic, I tell ya! --- From hardware store to builder’s depot Tiles—these seemingly trivial home fixtures transformed a small hardware store into one of the largest builder’s depots in the city today. And this fact Wilcon Builders Depot founder, president and CEO

Kachow!

Kachow! I have done what few people have achieved in their lifetime (but maybe they have done it, and they just don't brag it in their blogs like I do). It has taken me 3 months to finish the book. I have dismissed the book for a while because it was overbearing and overwritten...Imagine 200 pages worth of philosophical critques and inquiries about her damned Objectivism...not really an easy reading. But I am not a quitter...No, I'm not a quitter! I was determined to finish this 1000+ page of a monster. After reading it, the book was not as infernal as I thought it was. So, without further ado... Kachow! What I don't understand with Cars is that, during the scene where Lightning McQueen tries to chase Sally on the road, Sally runs over the puddle of water on the road, splashing water at Lightning from behind. Lightning's quick reflexes allowed him to evade the water, as he laughs victoriously, foiling Sally's plans. But suddenly, while taking his eye off the road,

George Lynch

I went to a guitar clinic at Yupangco in Buendia, and their guest was none other than Mr. George Lynch (who?) promoting his Yamaha L-Series. I'm not really familiar with stuff from Dokken and Lynch Mob, but I did get to see a guitar video by this guy. From what I remembered (although I could be very wrong here), he's got quite a dirty style, but unique nonetheless. And his nipple kept on popping from his loose tanktop. Blame the 80's. It was my first time to attend such event, so I didn't really know what to expect. But I did imagine that there was gonna be a lot of guitar virtuosity shit and all that. Before the actual event, a video played showing how a Yamaha acoustic guitar is made. Mixing the lutherier and guitar player standpoint, as well as advanced and traditional techniques of making the guitar, it was really fascinating... Enter Mr. Lynch. First 3 impressions: He's buff!. He's wearing a tanktop. He's gotten real old (d'oh) His style has gotten

you don't see mee

It has been a long time... A Phought to Tonder Last Saturday, well, Sunday at 2:30 a.m., I was reading a book while lying down on the bed of my room and having the radio play random tracks on the airwaves when suddenly, '3 Libras' swoons the room with that undeniably mesmerizing sweet-ass guitar plucked intro. I immediate put down the book I was reading and started to be hit by this thing they call 'good music'. At that moment, while memories surged and feeling drowsed in my head as I stared blankly at the ceiling, 2 things pop into my mind: 1) NU 107 Remote Control Weekend is the best thing on the radio especially past midnight where they usually play songs during my high school daze, and 2) with that song, Mer de Noms has reaffirmed itself to be one of the better album I own, although I usually keep forgetting it. Oh, I also remembered another thing; 3) write this as a blog entry. I remember during high school, when I had my aunt buy A Perfect Cirlce's debut fr

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SM Mall of Asia Where everything is big FILIPINOS love malls, and it’s not only because they like to buy things for themselves. It’s because they love to hang out and enjoy the comfortable environment just as much. The date May 20, 2006, will go down in history as proof that Filipinos cannot get enough of shopping malls with the colossal opening of SM Mall of Asia—SM’s grandest mall yet—at the tourist hotspot that is Manila Bay in Pasay City. click here to the full article

hangover

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All the elements are eloquenced by eternity...

Phoughts to Tonder I have been so blind all along! Instead of feasting and salivating over Bay Area Thrash scene, I should have listened to balls-to-the-walls Joisey Thrash (read: OVERKILL ! ) They're pretty much the most soild, consistent, and fairly prolific Metal band, and after listening to some not-so-heavy music as of late, this is a nice, swift Heavy Metal™ kick in the nads. Slayer sucks, Overkill p0wns j00!!!! A Life Milestone I am one of the first people in the world who has taken a piss on SM Mall of Asia on May 20, 2006 , a day before its grand opening, at around 2 p.m. Respect me! Day Late I just remembered this morning that X-Men: The Last Stand is premiering today, and to my dismay, I cannot see it today because I'm too lazy to do so. I'll just settle for tomorrow. Past Revisited After months of not listening to this album, for reason unknown, I have decided to give it a spin. It turns out that The Focusing Blur by Vintersorg is an underrated gem, a dia

lameness moves me

NBA's 23

In the NBA, Jersey number 23 simply means Michael Jordan. As simple as that. This indication is an apt tribute to one of basketball's finest players, if not the finest. However, there are still a number of players wearing the number 23 on their jerseys. It is understandable that these players are paying homage to their basketball hero, but it is disappointing that a lot of players happen to have used this number in their careers. One of the most glaring is Lebron James, who in fact seems to be destined to become the only player in NBA history who wears the same number as His Airness to reach the level of which Jordan competed and played, if not surpass it. Both are similar in a sense that they have a complete game, although James is taller and has a better physique. And at this stage, he may be the best 21 year old player who played the game, and better than Jordan was when he was 21, no question about that. Which brings me to the problem about his jersey number. Lebron has the gif

THE DA VIIIIIIINCIIIIIIIIII CODE!!!!!!!!11

Finally! After months of waiting in vain for this day to say these words, I now can shout to the world that... I HAVE RELIEVED MY DA VINCI CODE BONER!! Honestly, it quite failed to deliver the goods, not because the book is better than the movie (which is true, but that's not the point), but I feel that the storytelling is too fast and quick (or maybe I'm just fucking slow). It does not let the viewers digest every piece of information as much as they could have, which made the book so good. Aside from this, it was entertaining as hell, I didn't go to sleep during the film (always a good thing), and I didn't feel like a jackass after seeing it. Da Vinci Musings (with Spoilers, of course!): Paul Bettany playing Silas is just pure genius. He easily passes off as an albino, and his menacing look works as well. Sopie Neveu's character was dumbed down, which is a bummer, and gives too much way to Robert Langdon to assume the hero role. Bullllllshit. On a positive note, S

musicmusiclalalamusic

Thoughts to Ponder I have seen VH1's Behind the Music of Pantera through YouTube, and although the whole thing was sufficent to satiate the average person's curiosity for the band, it doesn't really say anything new from what has already been said ad nauseum . As always, their glam years prior to their "major label debut" Cowboys From Hell were omitted, whether intentionally or not, which makes this documentary anything but a definitive statement of the band's legacy. However, the segment where Terry Abbott shed tears over the murder of his son/Pantera axeman Darrell "Dimebag Darrell" Abbott during his performance on December 4, 2004 with his current band Damageplan, along with his brother/Pantera drummer Vinnie, was nothing less than touching. "Inside that rock n' roll exterior, was a boy." Bummer. Let me take a moment to bask into the beauty of song: Cody ChestnuTT "Serve This Royalty" off the album The Headphone Masterpie

all i want...is to be where you are

The Gathering How to Measure a Planet? (1998) This album is The Gathering’s Rust in Peace, or Seventh Son of a Seventh Son, for that matter. If I were to stretch it, it will closely resemble Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness by The Smashing Pumpkins, aside from both being double-disc affairs. These albums share a similarity, where the bands charted new musical territories and progressive ideas into their trademark sound. As a result, Megadeth got more technical, Iron Maiden got more theatrical, and Smashing Pumpkins got more famous. How to Measure a Planet? is a tour-de-force. It is the album where The Gathering finds their visions fulfilled, where they sounded like the way they should sound. They did away with the Metal and Gothic posing they fostered with their previous albums in order to create music without boundaries. They have basically toned down the guitars, and focused more on the dreamy atmosphere and the beautiful vocals. Anneke van Giersbergen has proven time and again

Instant Entry in 20 Minutes

What are the things running through my head while downloading a 3.4 MB song off Limewire with a dial-up conneciton? Ready...Go! 3% - The Los Angeles Clippers lost to the Phoenix Suns. Gademit. Obviously, I am rooting for the underdog, well, they're not really the underdogs of the series since Phoenix has been playing without Amare Stoudemire for the whole season and the playoffs, yet still managed to play superb basketball and grabbed the 2nd seed in the West, a feat nobody would have ever thought possible. However, great expectations weren't on the side of the Clippers as well, a franchise doomed to fail at the start of the season. Well, they're turned it around for the good, getting that 4th seed, which again not what everybody would have expected. Still, I still feel that the Clippers deserve to win the series because not only do they have the talent to advance to the next round, but because they're the Clippers, and sometimes in life, some people just need to be g
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